No wonder Vizzavi, the failed E1bn internet joint venture between Vivendi Universal and Vodafone, is valued at the princely sum of E0 by every analyst who covers Vivendi – even the group's chief executive didn't use it.

Jean-Marie Messier, the humbled former head of Vivendi, kindly left staff his personal e-mail address, no doubt so they could send him messages of ongoing support in his retirement. But rather than j6m@ vizzavi.com or even vivendinet, he chose his arch rival, AOL Time Warner, as his preferred e-mail host. As did his wife. Anyone who wishes to point out the irony can do so at jmmessier@aol.com.